Forgive?
by Flashman
Summary: After the utter defeat at the hands of Black WarGreymon, Cody takes some time to reflect on just why he and Ken may never be able to truely function together on the same team...


Forgive?  
A Digimon: Digital Monsters 02 fanfic  
By Christian Rogers  
+++  
The events of this story occur shortly after the end of  
"Ultimate Anti-Hero".  
+++  
  
I cannot forgive him.  
  
I wonder if they could forgive Hitler for his crimes as easily if he  
returned and apologized for them.  
  
I realize that sounds excessive, but it's how I feel... and I'm  
alone in that. Even Yolie thinks I'm just being stubborn now. I  
think that hurts the most. She's never yelled at me before...  
ever.  
  
I want to explain why I feel the way I do... but I can't. Davis  
would just say I'm a kid and have no idea of how the world "really"  
works. But I do. I know it well. I know it far too well.  
  
Yolie might... but... I know how she feels about Ken. She likes  
him. She was so devastated when she found out along with the  
rest of us that Ken was the Emperor and after the fight with Golemon,  
I saw her sending an e-mail and Ken looking at his D-Terminal before  
he left. I can guess what happened.  
  
And in a way, that makes me even angrier of him. He's turned my best  
friend against me.  
  
... I'm probably going too far with that. But...  
  
I just can't understand why everyone is so quick to forgive him after  
all he's done.  
  
Grandpa... he understands these things so well... I'll talk to him.  
  
After the disastrous fight with Black WarGreymon... we all need to  
go home and care for our wounds. Ken and Davis can explain their  
injuries as the result of a rough game of soccer and TK can say the  
same about a game of basketball... Kari said she had an excuse in place  
along with her brother Tai in case something like this happened...  
I'm not sure about Yolie and despite the initial "Are you okay" and  
"Can you walk" questions, we don't really say all that much to each  
other on the way home, Upamon and Poromon looking dejected in our  
arms.  
  
As I get off at my floor I turn around... and in that instant, I want  
to tell her... tell her WHY I feel the way I do... but the look on her  
face, the sad one I've seen so few times, shames me into silence again  
and the moment passes as the door closes.  
  
+ + +  
  
Mom was all over me the second I entered the door. She battered me  
with questions as to what happened and where did I hurt. I told her  
that I tried to stop a group of bullies from causing pain and the  
bullies proved to be stronger than I could handle.  
  
That's the truth... but I can't help but think if it's still considered  
lying if you leave out the details.  
  
Grandpa's not fooled. He knows there's more to it than I'm telling.  
Soon, I'm alone with him as he cleans my wounds with burning antiseptic  
and wraps them in small bandages. "So..." he says, "What is it that  
troubles your heart? And where is that pretty, young friend of yours?  
She's usually here for some of your mother's brownies around now."  
  
"I... don't think she's going to be coming over for a while," I say.  
  
"Did you have an argument with her?"  
  
"... Not exactly. I... Grandpa, can I ask you a question?"  
  
Grandpa frowns a little at not getting an answer to his question, but  
he can see this is bothering me, so the frown soon vanishes and he  
nods. "I know someone. He was terrible. He was... a monster. He  
killed. He destroyed thousands of lives and he didn't care. He  
laughed at the pain he caused. It was sickening to look at the carnage  
he left behind. It was even more sickening to think that, in his mind,  
such destruction made him even more firm in his belief that he was a  
superior human being and his final act of destruction was so terrible  
that there may never be a true recovery from it."  
  
"But..." Grandpa said, knowing there was more.  
  
"He wasn't killed in the end," I said, "He was defeated, his base of  
power shattered. He said he was sorry. He shed tears and he vanished  
for a while and when he came back... he seemed changed. He seemed to  
want to help lives rather than hurt him... but..."  
  
"But such a sudden change seems so strange," Grandpa said, "And you  
cannot bring yourself to trust him, even though your friend does."  
  
"Yes," I said, "It's... scary to see how quickly he's gained the trust  
of the others. After all he's done... why are they so willing to  
forgive him? Or am I being a fool? Is there something that I just  
can't see and does this mean I'm pushing my friends away with my  
stubbornness?"  
  
Grandpa sighs, "I have always said that your inflexibility was  
your deepest problem... yet, I can not fully blame you for not  
instantly trusting such a person."  
  
"But..." I say, also knowing there's more.  
  
"That does not mean you should shut yourself from the possibility that  
he could be truly changed. Keeping your guard up is good, but at  
least offer the chance that you can understand. And at least... fully  
explain your reservations to your friends."  
  
"... I'm still so little though," I say, looking at the floor, "I'm  
always afraid they'll think I'm being ignorant or that I just don't  
understand."  
  
Grandpa frowns again, deeper this time, "If they are truly your  
friends, then they would not think so, even for an instant."  
  
"... Thank you," I say, nodding slightly, "I understand. I... think  
I'll go talk to Yolie."  
  
"You do that," Grandpa says, "And be sure to ask her if she has anymore  
coupons for Prune Juice!"  
  
I laugh. It feels... good.  
  
+ + +  
  
I knock on the door.  
  
She answers. We talk. She may not agree with me and I may not agree  
with her... but Grandpa was right, she does listen and while, in her  
strange way she makes it clear she's not going to give up on getting  
me and Ken to get along, she's not going to labor the point.  
  
She's my friend.  
  
And when you have friends... I suppose it's okay to be wrong sometimes.  
  
Maybe... there is forgiveness in me.  
  
Maybe.  



End file.
